Through the Past Dorkily: Go Mental

Editor's note: Through the Past Dorkily is a recurring feature that looks back at the embarrassingly dorky diary I kept as a 16-year-old in 1984.

Friday, January 20, 1984

WAAF Top 5 at Five
1. Sister Christian - Night Ranger
2. Bark at the Moon - OZZY
3. Jump - Van Halen
4. Got a Hold on Me - Christine McVie
5. Send Me an Angel - Real Life

This was one of those rare Fridays that, for the most part, sucked. I slept in till 7 o'clock this morning. Mom had to drive us to school and I was about 10 minutes late. Then I had to hear the gory details of the College Lit final. We also have a 2-day final in Geography. We don't get a French mid-term at least. I went driving today and I get my road test on Tuesday.

Tomorrow we go to Manchester. I'm gonna wear that weird orange tie just for laughs. I'll ditch it after a while. It'll be good to see [various cute girls] and everyone. [Another cute girl] won't be there because she has a game. Too bad.

- The Barbarian

Saturday, January 21, 1984
OZZY CONCERT TONITE!

What a day! I got up at 9:30, took my guitar lessons, and got back at 12. Then I got ready for the trip. Got to the bus on time. Everybody cracked up at my tie. I told them it was my personality - loud and obnoxious. Jeremy brought his box - that's thing's massive! I got him to play Van Halen I [somebody else's tape] for a while. [Cute girls] were looking good! I half-flirted with 'em all day.

The first museum we went to was boring but it blew the hell out of the other place we saw. The first one had all the stuff you'd think to see in an art museum - paintings, paintings, and more paintings. The second place was an art school and it sucked. Then we went to The Chateau - a crummy restaurant. Their "Chicken Cordon Bleu" almost made me puke. Ugh! The only good thing was where I was sitting - beside [aforementioned cute girl] and across from [other aforementioned cute girl]. The meal cost $8.50 or so - what a ripoff! After dinner, we went to see Fruit Pie - I mean Kreskin. After a little mess-up with our seats, Kreskin came on. I got on stage with him when I caught a card he threw into the crowd (we were sitting in the balcony!). Me and 3 others had to hide his check and then he'd locate it. It was fun, but he got kinda pissed because we screwed it up a bit. Anyhoo, we left at 11:30 and I got a ride home from Jeremy, got back at 12:40. What a day!

- The Barbarian

Postscript: I was excited about there being an Ozzy concert in Worcester on this night, but unfortunately I didn't go. Instead, it was a field trip. I believe this Manchester trip was organized by my French teacher, in an attempt to culture us up a bit. Sounds like it worked, huh? A couple of museums, a French restaurant and then...the Amazing Kreskin? I had seen Kreskin a zillion times before on TV, mainly on The Tonight Show. Letterman had him Late Night a lot during the '80s and would just tool on him. I still have that card I caught, although no idea where it is. 

I like my description of my personality, "loud and obnoxious." I was really going for Borscht Belt comedian, I guess. All "wakka wakka" and arms held out, going, "Huh? Huh?" Yikes.