Unsung: In Search of the Canadian Beatles

Unsung is a feature in which I take a look at a pop culture phenomenon (be it music, TV, literary, whatever) that has been forgotten or underappreciated. In this installment, I look at the brief career of Klaatu, a mysterious Canadian prog-rock act that for a brief while had people thinking they were the reunited Beatles.

When the Beatles broke up in 1970, all four members immediately began releasing solo albums, but there was still a void left behind by the group's absence. Fans and promoters hoped in vain for a Beatles reunion, but it never happened; a promoter even offered the group $50 million to reunite for one show in 1974.

Even as music fans in the '70s moved on to other artists like Led Zeppelin, the Rolling Stones, David Bowie and the Who, you could still hear the Beatles' influence in bands like ELO and Badfinger (and obviously in the solo work of the Beatles themselves). Despite all that, when a Beatles-esque band called Klaatu emerged with their debut album in 1976, there were more than a few people willing to believe the record was actually the work of the reunited Beatles.

Of course, it wasn't. Klaatu was formed in Toronto in 1973 as a studio-only duo by John Woloschuk (vocals, bass, keyboards) and Dee Long (vocals, guitars, keyboards). They were later joined by drummer Terry Draper. The name was inspired by an alien in the sci-fi movie The Day the Earth Stood Still. They released the singles "Anus of Uranus/Sub Rosa Speedway" and "Dr. Marvello/For You Girl" before being signed to Daffodil Records. They had a hit in Canada in 1974 with "California Jam," which hit #36 on the Canadian singles chart. The band didn't tour, but they did appear on a Canadian TV show called Music Machine to play "California Jam." 

In 1975, Klaatu signed a deal with Capitol Records in the U.S. and began working on their debut album with producer Terry Brown, who was known for his work with Rush. The album was released in September 1976, called 3:47 EST in Canada and simply Klaatu in the U.S. The band opted to include no credits or identifying information on the band members in the liner notes, which created a mystique around them. 

Musically, there was definitely a heavy late-era Beatles sound going on, but other influences include prog rock, hard rock and '70s AM pop. Woloschuk sang with an English accent and definitely sounded like McCartney on some songs. But there was also really out-there prog stuff, including the use of vocoders and echoes of bands like King Crimson and Pink Floyd.

The trippy single "Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft" tapped into the '70s obsession with UFOs and caught some minor buzz, hitting #62 on the Billboard Hot 100 (the album version was over 7 minutes long while the single was about half that). A year later, the Carpenters covered the song and had a top 40 hit with it (#32) in the U.S.; the song led to a TV special called The Carpenters...Space Encounters.

But sales for Klaatu's album had fizzled when in 1977, a writer named Steve Smith published a column in the Providence Journal wondering if 3:47 EST was actually the work of the Beatles. He pointed to the fact that the album was released on the Beatles' label, Capitol, and that the band kept its members' identities secret and didn't tour, and that, well, they sure sounded like the Beatles. 

This led to some minor buzz, most of which the band missed because they were in the U.K. working on their next album. Although they did see this excellent headline in the New Musical Express: "Deaf Idiot Journalist Starts Beatles Rumor." Klaatu and Capitol did nothing to discourage the rumors because, well, any publicity is good publicity. The rumors died down after a radio station program director in Washington, DC, went to the U.S. Copyright Office and found the band members' real names.

The second Klaatu album was 1977's Hope, a sci-fi prog opera about visiting a distant planet. It featured contributions from the London Symphony Orchestra. It didn't fare as well as its predecessor, only reaching #83 on the Billboard 200 album chart. There was no mention of the band members listed on the album and no tour followed its release.

For the band's third album, 1978's Sir Army Suit, Capitol and the band (who included their names in the credits) did a lot of promotion, but it didn't pay off. After the Beatles rumor was dispelled, fans lost interest in Klaatu. The album was a lot poppier than the two previous records, with some hints of disco and metal included. It didn't chart. The fourth album, Endangered Species, came out in 1980 and charted in Canada (#55), but Capitol in the U.S. dropped the band after it failed to do anything Stateside.

Klaatu released one more album, 1981's Magentalane, which only came out in Canada and Mexico. It was a return to the band's more psychedelic sound. The band was contractually obligated to do a Canadian tour in November and added Gary McCracken of Max Webster on drums, Mike Gingrich on bass and Gerald O'Brien on keyboards. Long, who was not a fan of touring, quit the band in April 1982. O'Brien left and was replaced by Terry Watkinson (also formerly of Max Webster) and Marty Morin replaced McCracken for the rest of the tour. The band split up in August 1982.

The original members of Klaatu reunited in 1988 at George Martin's AIR Studios in London to record a single, which was released in West Germany and did not chart; the band didn't like the finished product. A second reunion took place in 2005 when the band played a short, mostly acoustic set at the KlaatuKon fan convention in Toronto.

Although they haven't played live since, the three band members have worked together on remastered album releases and rarities collections.

Growing up in Toronto in the '70s, I had heard of Klaatu and probably heard a few songs on the radio, but nothing really stuck with me. But I visited my daughter there this week and having stumbled up on something about the band while reading an article online, I picked up a used vinyl copy of Hope and started listening to 3:45 EST on YouTube. Really enjoyable stuff. You can tell they're big Beatles fans, but there's a lot of other stuff going on, too. Worth checking out if you like slightly proggy pop-rock.

Day After Day #278: DVP

Day After Day is an ambitious attempt to write about a song every day in 2024 (starting on Jan. 4).

DVP (2016)

I've been writing the majority of these posts about music from many years ago, but that's not to imply that I don't listen to current rock music. For the last 11 years, I've been putting together a weekly radio show and most of those episodes include an hour of new music. One of the bands that I've really grown to love is PUP, a punk-pop act out of my hometown Toronto.

Originally called Topanga (after a character on the old sitcom Boy Meets World), the band was formed in 2010 by bassist Nestor Chumak, guitarist Steve Sladkowski, drummer Zack Mykula and singer-guitarist Stefan Babcock. As the group's sound got heavier and punkier, they decided to change their name to PUP, which was an acronym based on a quote from Babcock's grandmother; she said playing in a rock band was a "pathetic use of potential."

The band released their self-titled debut in Canada in October 2013, later signing to SideOneDummy and re-releasing it in the U.S. in April 2014. A heavy touring schedule with bands like the Hives, the Menzingers, Lemuria and Cayetana helped generate buzz for PUP, which then played at the Reading and Leeds festivals in the U.K. and Riot Fest at Chicago and Toronto. The group specializes in sarcastic lyrics, big riffs, gang vocals and catchy hooks.

The group's second album, The Dream is Over, came out in May 2016; the title was a quote from Babcock's doctor after examining the singer's damaged vocal cords. The lead track on the album, "If This Tour Doesn't Kill You, I Will," starts off quietly before erupting in punk fury halfway through and it segues right into the album's first single, "DVP," named after the heavily congested highway that runs through Toronto.

"Your sister thinks that I'm a freak/She's been ignoring my calls, we haven't spoken in a week/I get so drunk that I can't speak/Yeah, nothing's workin' and our future's lookin' bleak, and I said/Three beers and I'm so messed up/Get drunk and I can't shut up/She says that I drink too much/I'm fucked up and she hates my guts/She says I need to grow up."

The song hurtles along as Babcock continues to chronicle his bad decisions.

"I'm drivin' fast to get away/Doin' 180 on the Don Valley Parkway/Yeah, I'd be better off dead/I don't give a shit, I just don't wanna die, and I don't wanna live, I said."

Babcock has expressed some regret about the song glorifying bad habits, but he said he still loves the song. Certainly it's not the first song about immature behavior; it's definitely a cautionary tale, at least for those of us who have moved on from such hijinks.

"Three beers and I'm so messed up/Get drunk and I can't shut up/She says that I drink too much/Fucked up and she hates my guts/I just don't know what to do/I'm still fucked up over you/She says that I drink too much/Hawaiian red fruit punch/She says I need to grow up."

The band released a fun lyric video for the song, with the lyrics running over clips from classic videogames. The Dream is Over hit #82 on the Billboard 200 and performed well on several other Billboard charts, including topping the Heatseekers Albums chart.

In the years since, PUP has released two more albums and an EP, all of which are excellent. The most recent is 2022's The Unraveling of PUPTheBand, a concept album about a band named PUP that was falling apart. Somehow I still haven't seen them live, which is something I plan to rectify the next time they come through town. The band doesn't take itself seriously, which is part of its appeal, but it still rocks furiously. PUP is one of the best groups going right now.

Day After Day #266: Echo Beach

Day After Day is an ambitious attempt to write about a song every day in 2024 (starting on Jan. 4).

Echo Beach (1980)

The transition from the '70s to the '80s was exciting for those of us who were around at the time. It felt like we were moving into a more futuristic decade, although a lot of that was built up by science fiction and movies like Star Wars. Another shift was in music, where the rock dinosaurs of the '70s were losing some (not all) traction to new wave and post-punk acts. Keyboards and synths were in vogue, guitar solos not so much. 

In Toronto, where I was a 12-year-old voraciously listening to top 40 radio, some of these new sounds were becoming popular: The B-52s, Gary Numan, Devo, Madness. And then a local act came out of left field with a catchy little song that caught fire around the world (if not the U.S.).

Martha and the Muffins was formed in 1977 when Ontario College of Art students David Millar and Mark Gane decided to start a band. They got Martha Johnson as lead vocalist and keyboardist, Carl Finkle on bass and Gane's brother Tim on drums. The band was chosen as a counterpoint to the aggro names of many of the Toronto punk bands at the time, with plans to come up with a better name at some point. Millar left the band in 1978 and was replaced by Martha Ladly, who played keyboards and sang backup vocals.

After independently releasing a single, they scored a record deal with Dindisc, a U.K.-based imprint of Virgin Records. The band traveled to England in 1979 and recorded their debut album Metro Music, which was released in February 1980. 

The first single was "Echo Beach," a song written by Mark Gane about his experiences working at a boring job (in his case, in a wallpaper factory after his first summer at art school) and dreaming of being somewhere else. The song starts with a circular guitar riff before Johnson comes in on the Ace Tone organ; Gane said he was very influenced by Roxy Music, both lyrically and musically.

"I know it's out of fashion, and a trifle uncool/But I can't help it, I'm a romantic fool/It's a habit of mine, to watch the sun go down/On Echo Beach, I watch the sun go down/From 9 to 5, I have to spend my time at work/My job is very boring, I'm an office clerk/The only thing that helps me pass the time away/Is know I'll be back at Echo Beach someday."

Gane came up with the second verse when hanging out on the shore of Lake Ontario and seeing the city skyline at night.

"On a silent summer evening, the sky's alive with lights/A building in the distance, surrealistic sight/On Echo Beach, waves make the only sound/On Echo Beach, there's not a soul around/From 9 to 5, I have to spend my time at work/My job is very boring, I'm an office clerk/The only thing that helps me pass the time away/Is knowing I'll be back at Echo Beach someday."

Sax player Andy Haas provided the solo before the extended end section. Johnson has said she had a cold when the song was recorded, and the final line "Echo Beach, far away in time" (which was repeated many times) made her voice sound a little deeper than it actually was.

While there are many Echo Beaches in the world (including in Saskatchewan and Australia), Gane has said he just made up the name.

The song never clicked in the U.S., but it hit #5 in Canada, #6 in Australia and #10 in the U.K. and it won the Juno award for Single of the Year (the Canuck equivalent of the Grammy Awards). Martha and the Muffins ended up opening for Roxy Music that year at Wembley Arena and in Glasgow, but then Bryan Ferry got sick and the rest of the tour was cancelled. 

The band released their second album, Trance and Dance, in October 1980, but it didn't have any hit singles. Ladly left the band, followed by Finkle, who was replaced on bass by Jocelyne Lanois; her brother was then-unknown producer Daniel Lanois, who ended up producing the group's next three albums. In 1983, the group changed its name to M + M because Gane was sick of the original name; they stuck with M + M for three years before going back. The group's 1984 album Mystery Walk scored a hit with "Black Stations/White Stations"; it was a hit in Canada and got to #2 on the U.S. dance music charts but many stations refused to play it because it was about stations refusing to play a song about mixed-race romance. 

In 1987, British singer Toyah Wilcox covered "Echo Beach"; the song hit #54 on the U.K. Singles Chart. Wilcox is now married to Robert Fripp, who was in attendance at the band's first show in New York City in the late '70s.

Johnson and Gane kept the group going as a duo, releasing an album in 1992 that didn't sell well. That year, the couple had a baby and shut the band down. They released a children's album in 1995 (credited to "Martha"), and played occasional reunion performances over the next decade. In 2010, a new Martha and the Muffins album was released, and in 2013, Johnson crowdfunded a solo album. The band released an odds-and-sods compilation in 2021 and said at the time they were working on a new album, but nothing has come out as of yet.

"Echo Beach" still sounds fresh to me all these years later, even as it reminds me of being 12 years old in the Toronto burbs and not relating to being bored at a job yet. But it was catchy as hell and remains so.

Day After Day #122: Vital Signs

Day After Day is an ambitious attempt to write about a song every day in 2024 (starting on Jan. 4).

Vital Signs (1981)

I know Rush can be an acquired taste (or a complete turnoff) for some folks. But not me. I grew up in Toronto in the '70s and early '80s and Rush was what I gravitated toward. I've expanded my musical worldview considerably since then and got into punk and indie and funk and all sorts of cool shit, but I still like to listen to Rush every so often.

Growing up in Pickering, Ontario, a suburb east of Toronto, I used to hear about how Rush played at one of the high schools in town in the mid-'70s. I got into them around 1980 when Permanent Waves came out, although the first album I had was 1975's Fly By Night. 

I was in seventh grade and a classmate of mine, who was kind of a troublemaker, had an older brother who went to college so naturally, the kid decided to sell a bunch of his brother's stuff. Because that's what you do, right? No consequences down the road for that. Anyway, the kid knew I was a big hockey card collector and traded two of his brother's records for a bunch of cards. I gave him a bunch of my doubles for Led Zeppelin II and Fly By Night. This was just as I was getting into music, so I immersed myself in these records, which were both amazing. Of course, fast forward a few months and the kid comes back to me, begging me to give the albums back because his brother was home from college and obviously enraged that all his shit was gone. I was bummed but I sold them back for a few bucks each and then went and bought Zeppelin's In Through the Out Door, which was still relatively new. 

Even though I didn't have the album anymore, my temporary ownership of Fly By Night turned me into a big Rush fan (as well as hearing them on the radio regularly). Not long afterward, the band released their eighth studio album Moving Pictures, which is their most successful. They had begun playing Led Zep and Cream-inspired riff rock, turned to prog-rock and long, complex suites, and then with Permanent Waves, started playing shorter, more radio-friendly songs.

Moving Pictures saw them do this to full effect, with "Tom Sawyer" becoming their best-known song and eventually a classic rock radio staple. That, "Limelight," "Red Barchetta" and the instrumental "YYZ" made up a killer side 1 of the album, while side 2 got a little less hype. But album closer "Vital Signs" might be one of the more underrated songs in Rush's catalog.

In "Vital Signs," Rush lyricist and drummer Neil Peart discusses how humans are interacting with technology, which admittedly was very different 43 years ago than it is today. 

"Unstable condition/A symptom of life/In mental and environmental change/Atmospheric disturbance/The feverish flux/Of human interface and interchange/The impulse is pure/Sometimes our circuits get shorted/By external interference/Signals get crossed/And the balance distorted/By internal incoherence."

In the chorus, singer Geddy Lee notes that despite the acceptance of technological advancements, it's important to maintain your individuality. Peart often wrote about individuality in Rush's early years, especially on the album 2112. 

"A tired mind become a shape shifter/Everybody need a mood lifter/Everybody need reverse polarity/Everybody got mixed feelings/About the function and the form/Everybody got to deviate/From the norm."

Another interesting thing about "Vital Signs" is it was sort of a preview into the band's next musical shift, as they used it to try out some Police-esque reggae as well as some futuristic sounding sequencers. And Peart was also very influenced by Police drummer Stewart Copeland's more minimalistic style; known very much as an "everything but the kitchen sink" drummer, Peart began playing more economically like Copeland.

Indeed, the band's next album, 1982's Signals, was very different from what came before. The band introduced much more electronic sounds (and have acknowledged after the fact that maybe they went a little overboard) for the rest of the '80s before going back to a more guitar-based sound in the early '90s. They continued to release albums and tour successfully until 2015, when Peart retired. Lee and Alex Lifeson have made occasional appearances since then, but the band effectively ended when Peart called it a day. Sadly, Peart died in 2020 after a battle with brain cancer.

I saw Rush in concert on the Grace Under Pressure in 1984 and then twice on the Power Windows tour in '85, but I never saw them again after that. Honestly, I'm not sure why, although it was partly because I was just listening to other types of music for much of that time. I wanted to see them on one of their final tours but just never got my act together to get tickets. But thankfully there's plenty of great live footage on YouTube to check out whenever I feel like it. I especially like finding old clips of them that I haven't seen from the early days, which remind me of trading extra hockey cards for some stolen vinyl.

Found Object: Spin the Black Circle

Editor's note: Found Object is a new recurring feature that's part writing exercise, part old guy reflections. Each entry is about a different piece of detritus that I've collected at some point in my life.

My love for rock music has been a constant in my life since the late '70s, when I started listening to the radio regularly. As a young tween in the Toronto burbs, the first station I really listened to (besides listening to Blue Jays games on CKFH 1430 AM) was 1050 CHUM AM, which played a wide swath of popular music. This included rock (1979's top 100 songs list included Led Zeppelin, Cheap Trick, Styx and Foreigner) disco (Bee Gees, Village People, Donna Summer), new wave (Blondie, the Knack, the Cars, Boomtown Rats), pop (Billy Joel, Linda Ronstadt, Rod Stewart) and middle-of-the-road (Barbra Streisand, Neil Diamond, Anne Murray, Dionne Warwick). Each week, the station published a chart of its top 30 songs (and its FM counterpart did the same with a top albums chart) in the Toronto Star; I used to cut them out and still have a pile of them in the basement somewhere.

But it was around this time that I started buying 45s. I only picked up a handful at the time; they were cheap (under $1, I believe) and fun, but I soon started buying albums instead. Still, I picked up "Let's Go" by The Cars, "The Logical Song" by Supertramp, "Another One Bites the Dust" by Queen, "Heartache Tonight" by the Eagles, "Weekend" by Wet Willie, "Dream Police" by Cheap Trick and this classic, Joe Jackson's "I'm the Man":

I can even remember when I bought this...sort of. I don't remember the exact date or anything. I do remember that I was with my mom at an Eaton's department store in the Toronto area in late '79 and while she was off shopping for whatever boring stuff she needed, I was in the record section perusing through the stacks. I was obsessed with this song from the first time I heard it on the radio. Couldn't get enough of it. Still can't, really. I got into Jackson a year earlier when "Is She Really Going Out With Him?" came out, but this song was so uptempo and catchy, it made me a fan for life.

As I mentioned, I had also started buying albums and they became the focus of my music obsession. I started getting singles again in the mid-'80s as a way to get B-sides: I've got a bunch of 45s from Iron Maiden, U2, and Def Leppard for that purpose. I would add them to cassettes of the albums they came out with. In the late '80s, I picked up a few random 45s of pop hits when I knew I didn't want to necessarily get the album. By that point, the cassingle started to pop up in stores so I picked up a few of those for B-sides. Then by the early '90s, it was CD singles. And then, of course, MP3s. Now, everything's getting pushed aside in favor of streaming. But me, I still like to own music.

Completely Conspicuous 391: I'm the Man

Quick hit episode this week as I discuss the power of a song. Listen to the episode below or download directly (right click and "save as").

Show notes:
- In 1979, I listened to Toronto's CHUM-AM all the time
- Used to collect the Top 30 singles chart every Friday
- A song that captured my imagination was Joe Jackson's "I'm the Man"
- The clock radio was important
- Couldn't get enough of "I'm the Man"
- Still powerful after all these years
- Jackson's best work was in the late '70s/early '80s

Completely Conspicuous is available through the iTunes podcast directory. Subscribe and write a review!

The opening and closing theme of Completely Conspicuous is "Theme to Big F'in Pants" by Jay Breitling. Find out more about Senor Breitling at his fine music blog Clicky Clicky. Voiceover work is courtesy of James Gralian.

Through the Past Dorkily: Do It Again

Editor's note: Through the Past Dorkily is a recurring feature that looks back at the embarrassingly dorky diary I kept as a 16-year-old in 1984.

Sunday, November 18, 1984

Song of the day: The Number of the Beast - Iron Maiden

I went to church. [A couple of friends] were there.

Later on we went to Methuen Mall. I didn't buy anything.

Heavy Metal from Hell was awesome tonight! Bruce Dickinson was at WBCN and he played some of his fave tunes. He also announced a new tour date. Get ready. Maiden and Sister at the Centrum on Jan. 23! Awesome! Too bad I can't go.

- The Barbarian

Monday, November 19, 1984

Song of the day: School - Supertramp

Top 5 at Five
1. Perfect Strangers - Deep Purple
2. The Boys of Summer - Don Henley
3. Into the Fire - Dokken
4. Call to the Heart - Giuffria
5. Not Such a Bad Boy - Paul McCartney

Today was alright. Not much happened in school. I finally understand domain and range, and it's a good thing because we have a test in Adv Math tomorrow.

I bought my senior t-shirt, didn't like it and then sold it to [a buddy].

I got Holy Diver and Balls to the Wall today.

My contacts should be in tomorrow.

I had to pick Dad's car up from the gas station. I took it to the Post Office to get my stuff.

The financial aid workshop was boring. We left early. They talked to [one of my teachers]. He said I was a lazy bum. They didn't talk to anyone else.

- The Barbarian

Tuesday, November 20, 1984

Song of the day: Stand Up and Shout - Dio

Top 5 at Five
1. The Boys of Summer - Don Henley
2. Perfect Strangers - Deep Purple
3. Tender Years - John Cafferty and Beaver Brown
4. Spellbound - Triumph
5. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner

I handed in my camera obscura today.

[Cute girl] got a rose in her locker this morning from a secret admirer (actually, it was [redacted]). I don't think she really likes him.

I blew 2 questions on the Adv Math test. I think I did good on the Computers quiz.

I got [buddy] to give me a ride to [optometrist] after school. He wasn't there, so I hadda go home. I called the Plaistow office and they had the lenses in. I went and got it at 6:30.

I finished reading White Gold Wielder just before I went to bed.

Everything's ready. Sammy's at the kennel. Let's roll!

- The Barbarian

Wednesday, November 21, 1984

Song of the day: All We Are - Kim Mitchell

We left home at 7:15. It was nice and sunny out. I won't bore you with driving details. I drove about 100 miles. We got there at 6:30.

We had dinner and went to bed. Q107 is now the best rock station in Toronto. Chum FM plays crap like Tina Turner, Prince and Cyndi Lauper along with rock. We listened to WOUR 96.9 Utica/Rome NY for a lot of the way.

- The Barbarian

Thursday, November 22, 1984

Song of the day: Gimme Gimme Good Lovin' -  Helix

Today Dad dropped Mom, me and JP off at the Eaton Centre. First we got our money changed at the bank. I got $40. I went to Music World and found the new Triumph album, Thunder Seven there! Awesome! I bought it along with Kim Mitchell's Akimbo Alogo. I also picked up the new Guitar World with Jeff Beck on the cover and the second issue of Metallion magazine.

Mom met [old friends] and we all had lunch at Mr. Greenjeans. I wanted to go shopping in the streets but Mom wanted to go home.

We went to [family friends'] house. They had a new dog that they were mistreating. It's a cocker spaniel. Cute.

- The Barbarian

P.S. Oh yeah, JP bought me a new pair of headphones.

Friday, November 23, 1984

Song of the day: That's a Man - Kim Mitchell.


Today kinda sucked. Mom dropped me and JP off at Scarborough Town Centre. I bought Deep Purple's Perfect Strangers and Helix's Walkin' the Razor's Edge. I also got 2 books, The Game by Ken Dryden and an NHL guide to the 1984-85 season. Then we had to wait 2 hours for Mom to come because something was wrong with the car. Anyhoo, we finally got home.

Later on, [family friends] came over for dinner. Fun stuff.

- The Barbarian

Saturday, November 24, 1984

Song of the day: Rock Out, Roll On - Triumph 

Busy day. First we went to Scarborough to have breakfast at [redacted]'s house. [The son] is now 5 foot 8, has glasses and braces and is not hyper anymore. [His sister] is the same (height, attitude, etc.). [The father] was looking well. They're gonna buy a $200,000 house.

Then went to [redacted]'s house. [Older son] is 8 now. He's got a little brother, who's 1 1/2 years old. Cute little bugger.

Next was [redacted]'s house. We had dinner and then had to stay over because they asked. I had no toothbrush or new clothes or anything. Oh well.

While at the Morningside Mall with Mom and [redacted] earlier, I bought Vices by Kick Axe.

[Redacted]'s skinnier, [her brother]'s still a little kook. He's collecting comics now.

- The Barbarian

Sunday, November 25, 1984

Song of the day: Lager and Ale - Kim Mitchell

We got up at 10, had breakfast and then met Mom and Dad at [redacted]'s house. We were there for a while. [Daughter]'s all grown up now. She doesn't talk as much as before. Then Dad dropped me off at Pickering. I went in the building and was waiting for [an old buddy] when I met [a kid I knew from elementary school]. He was pretty friendly. He was in a hurry but he asked me to give [my buddy] my address so he could write me a letter. Wow. [Buddy] cane down and we went to the flea market. He still looks the same. We talked about just about everything. We went to the new sports complex and hung out there. It's awesome. It's got a hockey rink, swimming pool and more. We met [two other old buddies of mine] who were skating there. We all talked for a while. Then me and [first buddy] went to the Go station where I got a ticket for the 6 o'clock train. I gave him $10 since I didn't need the money anymore. I took the train and subway home. We had dinner with [redacted]. Dad got drunk and fell asleep. Ha.

- The Barbarian

Monday, November 26, 1984

Song of the day: Under the Gun - Deep Purple

We got up at 4:30 and left at 5. It was so foggy you couldn't see 2 feet in front of you. We had to stop and wait for an hour for it to clear. Even then, it wasn't that good. But somehow, we made it home all right. I drove good.

We got home at 7. We picked up Sammy. Everything was how we left it.

A good trip.

- The Barbarian

Tuesday, November 27, 1984

Song of the day: Heavy Metal Shuffle - Kick Axe

Top 5 at Five
1. Perfect Strangers - Deep Purple
2. Purple Haze - Jimi Hendrix
3. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
4. The Boys of Summer - Don Henley
5. Steel Claw - Tina Turner

Back to school again. I got a 45/50 on that Daphnia lab. We took a quiz in Adv Math. I did good. I got a 49 on that Computers quiz. I can't believe it.

After school, me and Jeremy went to [classmate]'s house for a Junior class crafts fair meeting. I needed the ride home so I came. [Various friends] were there. We stayed until 3:30.

- The Barbarian

Wednesday, November 28, 1984

Song of the day: Killing Time - Triumph

Top 5 at Five
1. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
2. Perfect Strangers - Deep Purple
3. Call to the Heart - Giuffria
4. Heaven's On Fire - KISS
5. Heaven - Bryan Adams

Pretty boring day. There was massive fog rolling around. [Cute girl] is getting pretty friendly. Who knows.

Went to the Youth Enquirers meeting at 3:30. It was just us and the Rev.'s daughter.

- The Barbarian

Thursday, November 29, 1984

Song of the day: Summer of '69 - Bryan Adams

Top 5 at Five
1. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
2. Move It On Over - George Thorogood
3. The Boys of Summer - Don Henley
4. Our Love - Krokus
5. Do It Again - The Kinks

I got an A on my camera obscura. [Teacher] wasn't at school today. [Goofball classmate] was back in school today. Oh, jump for joy.

I came home and just slept.

- The Barbarian

Friday, November 30, 1984

Song of the day: Cool Down - Triumph

Top 5 of the Week
1. Perfect Strangers - Deep Purple
2. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
3. The Boys of Summer - Don Henley
4. Heaven's On Fire - KISS
5. Santa Claus is Comin' to Town - Bruce Springsteen

Everything was fine until 4th period. Then I found out I got a 64 on that test we took! Plus we took a quiz that I totally flunked! Why can't I get an A in there?

Then I fell asleep in Psychology. I didn't get my program done, either.

[Hot chick] told me that [reporter] from the Carriage Towne News took a picture of me on Dress-Up Day that's going in the paper. The caption reads: The Gay Blade is alive and well at Sanborn. Great.

I went out and bought 5 comics today. I'm back in the saddle.

I also went to the Bucket. I talked to [two buddies] and the luscious [redacted]. She's hot!

- The Barbarian

Saturday, December 1, 1984

Song of the day: A Gypsy's Kiss - Deep Purple

I got up at 6:40. [Buddy] picked me up at 7:45 and we went to the Achievement Tests. We got in there just as the first group of 15 were sent in. The guy wouldn't let us go with them, so we had to wait til 9. We finally got started at 9:15. The tests weren't that bad. English was easy, Lit you really can't tell and Math I'm hoping for the best. I hope I do good!

We were the last people out. Geez. We went to McDonalds for lunch and then home.

I drove Mom to Methuen where I got 7 comics. Then we went to the Bucket and came home. After that, I picked up a pizza from the plaza.

- The Barbarian

Sunday, December 2, 1984

Song of the day: Time Goes By - Triumph

I slept in this morning and didn't go to church. When I took the garbage to the dump, I kep going past the house on the way back. I went to Westville and picked up Thor 352, Rom 63 and the last Marvel Team Up 150. I then zipped and was home at 12:05 or so.

Later on, I had to go to the Westville Supply to return something. Then I went into Westville and got Capt. America 302, Hulk 304 and Iceman 2.

I did the first essay on my Yale application.

- The Barbarian

Monday, December 3, 1984

Song of the day: Do It Again - The Kinks

Top 5 at Five
1. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
2. Do It Again - The Kinks
3. Flying High Again - Ozzy Osbourne
4. Santa Claus is Comin' to Town - Bruce Springsteen
5. Spellbound - Triumph

Typical Monday. Well, it wasn't that bad. Me and [classmate] got our enlargements done. The Field Bio test went alright. I hope I get an A. I got an A on that Psychology test. I get till tomorrow to hand in my program.

I got a ride home from [buddy] because Jeremy had track practice. [Classmate] trashed his car on Friday on Hunt Rd. What a joke!

Jeremy told me of a comic shop in Salem. It's on the strip way at the end. Me and [buddy] want to go there on the weekend.

I moved my comic boxes around. 2 of them are out by my record box where I can get at 'em! The Second Renaissance of Comics, Kumar style!

- The Barbarian

Tuesday, December 4, 1984

Song of the day: Dazed and Confused (live) - Led Zep      

Top 5 at Five 
1. Do It Again - The Kinks
2. Santa Claus is Comin' to Town - Bruce Springsteen
3. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
4. Don't Worry Baby - Los Lobos
5. Heaven's On Fire - KISS

What a day! Whew! I got a 79 on that Field Bio test. I couldn't believe it!

[Journalism teacher] got a letter from the editor of The Kingstonian about my story. He wanted an apology. [Teacher] started giving me crap and giving the whole class a lecture on libel. It really isn't that bad a case, but he wanted to get a point across. I think the "boring rag" line was what did it. Oh well. I have to write an apology now. Beat.

In computers, I didn't get my program to work and I'll probably get an F on it. Beat.

I got Song Remains the Same from RCA today. Awesome.

I bought comics from Westville. Cap 303, Peter Parker 99, Beauty/Beast 2, Daredevil 216, Groo 001, Teen Titans 50 and 51. Good stuff.

- The Barbarian

Wednesday, December 5, 1984

Song of the day: Sunset Grill - Don Henley

Top 5 at Five
1. Santa Claus is Comin' to Town - Bruce Springsteen
2. Do It Again - The Kinks
3. Metal Health - Quiet Riot
4. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner
5. Don't Worry Baby - Los Lobos

Another great day. Ever since I got back from Toronto, school has really sucked! I got a 100 on one quiz, 19 on another in Adv Math. I lost points on that test and got a 60. I don't know. I got a D on that program. I hope I did good on that quiz we took.

After school, Jeremy came in to look at my comics. I let him borrow some. Then we went to his house and he let me borrow a whole humongo stack of his. All the X-Men I missed, Secret Wars, Titans and tons more. Plus he gave me Avengers 249 and Thor 349.

We went to church later.

- The Barbarian

Thursday, December 6, 1984

Song of the day: Don't Eat That Yellow Snow - Frank Zappa

Top 5 at Five
1. Santa Claus is Comin' to Town - Bruce Springsteen
2. The Boys of Summer - Don Henley
3. Stranger in Town - Toto
4. The Old Man Down the Road - John Fogerty
5. Don't Worry Baby - Los Lobos

Snow! We finally got some snow. About half a foot. There was a 2-hour school delay this morning. I just sat around reading comics.

We missed 1st and 2nd periods and had the rest of the classes. I got a 20 on that Adv Math notebook quiz. If I don't get my act together, my class rank will be all shot to hell! We've got another quiz tomorrow. Great. I also have a Psych test tomorrow. Should be easy. I got an 84 on that Computers quiz. Phew!

[Cute girl]'s pretty awesome!

- The Barbarian

Postscript: Whew! Lots going on here. The Toronto trip wasn't my first return since moving away. My brother and I spent two weeks up there in the summer of '83, but this was the first we'd all gone back. Hence all the visits with friends and relatives. It was cool to go back to Pickering, where I'd spent the last seven years before moving to the U.S. Sadly, I've lost touch with most of my friends from those days; of the core group of four or five guys who used to hang out all the time, I'm the only one on Facebook as far as I know. I've sort of connected with one of the guys, who's on Twitter but never tweets. I next went up to Toronto in the summer of '86, I think, with a buddy of mine. And have gone up every few years or so since then. This was also a cool trip because I was able to get some highway driving in.

School's a struggle. I'm not sure if I was just screwing off too much or what, but I don't remember all these shitty grades. Good thing they had no bearing on my adult life, huh?

I had forgotten about the whole Journalism class thing. We had a page in one of the local papers that we contributed to and for some reason they decided not to run it anymore. So I guess wrote a little opinion piece in the paper we jumped to, basically ripping on the other paper. Ruffled a few feathers. It blew over.

I was big into comics for the last few years I lived in Toronto and then in Washington state when we lived there. For some reason, I stopped reading them after we got to New Hampshire. But I guess seeing my cousin's collection while in Toronto got me interested again, and I jumped back into it with gusto when we got home. One thing for sure, I've always been good at spending money on entertainment.

I still enjoy the Can-Rock that nobody down here's heard of. Like Kim Mitchell, who used to be the frontman for Max Webster. Who? Exactly. Dude's a legend up in Canada. Kinda weird-looking but a helluva guitarist. He had minor success Stateside in '85 with "Go For Soda," which everyone thought was an anti-drinking song. The same album had a few odes to getting schnockered, including this song:

 
   

The Mayor of Simpleton

It's no secret I've got a soft spot for the city of Toronto. I was born there, lived there until I was 14 and still all these years and miles later root for crappy Toronto sports teams. I've still got family and friends up there, and we just had a nice vacation up there this summer.

Which is why I've got such mixed emotions about the whole Rob Ford fiasco. If you've been living under a rock that's located underneath Aquaman's underwater lair, you're likely the only person who hasn't laughed your ass off/shaken your head at the ridiculous series of events Ford has triggered over the last year or so: Being caught on camera smoking crack, denying said video and said crack, admitting said video and said crack, being accused of sexual harassment, other drug charges, making a reference in a press conference to performing cunnilingus on his wife, bowling over a female city councilor during a meeting, getting caught on tape threatening to kill someone. And this is just the most recent stuff. It's gotten to the point where people actually refer to Ford's title as "Crack-Smoking Mayor Rob Ford." Boing Boing regularly calls Ford the Laughable Bumblefuck, which is about as accurate a description of the man as you'll find.

Naturally, Ford's become the laughingstock of the tabloids and late-night TV:



It's hard not to find this hilarious...because it is. Sure, it's sad that this buffoon is leading one of the biggest and best cities in North America, but really, are the best and brightest getting into leadership positions these days? Here in Boston, we've got Tom "Mumbles" Menino, who regularly butchers names and the English language and yet somehow has led the city of Boston for 20 years. And one can easily run off any number of presidents, politicians and other public leaders whose IQs are sub-standard. So the law of averages probably means that a dolt like Ford was due to get elected eventually.

I want the best for Toronto because I still consider it my hometown, even though I haven't lived there in more than 30 years. At the same time, I'm enjoying the hell out of this Rob Ford fiasco. I hope he gets re-elected because dammit, this shit is funny.

Toronto Tontos

Our first vacation of the summer is winding down, as we just returned from five days in Toronto (I had planned to file a couple of dispatches from there, but it just never worked out. I was either too tired after a long day of activities, or the Internet at my uncle's house was out.). We headed up last Friday night to Syracuse, which is a little more than halfway through the 10+ hour drive. Smooth sailing until just past Albany, when a torrential thunderstorm just dropped on us like a giant anvil. We hit the road around 8:30 the next morning and ran into some more rain intermittently until we got to the border crossing in Buffalo, where we sat for an hour. Still, we got to my uncle's house in Mississauga in the early afternoon and hung out there with my cousins. We met my cousin Dev's almost 2-year-old son (his wife's expecting a second child in the fall) and got to see his wife Rani and sister Anita; always great to see those guys. We were last up there in 2009 and stayed at the same place.


This time around, we decided to do some touristy stuff with the kids: We hit the CN Tower and the Jays-Rays game on Sunday, the Ontario Science Centre on Monday. We were going to go to Casa Loma and the Royal Ontario Museum on Tuesday, but we decided to take it easy and just stay local in Mississauga; we took the kids to a place called the Playdium that had mini golf and stuff like that. Then I went in to the Jays-Dodgers game that night with Dev and my uncle Partha, where we met some buddies of Dev's. It was a great game, as the Jays took an 8-3 lead, but they blew it and lost 10-9. We ended up going out after the game and didn't get home until 1:30. Needless to say, we were a little fuzzy the next day (especially Dev). On Wednesday, we drove out to the Toronto Zoo, which Deb and I had gone to 11 years ago with Hannah when she was a baby. We went with my aunt Bharathi and met Anita, Rani and little Raj there; we did a ton of walking but had a great day. And just like that, the trip was over.

We made good time yesterday until we got to the Mass Pike around rush hour. It started pouring and we sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for a long goddamn time. But we finally made it home okay. I was hoping to hit a few record stores up there, but it wasn't to be. There just wasn't any time. But we all had a blast and that's all that matters. And in a few weeks, we're off to Hilton Head for vacation #2.

Completely Conspicuous 282: Lost Causes

Part 2 of my conversation with guest Brian Lewandowski as we discuss our status as outsider sports fans in the Boston area. Listen to the episode below or download it directly (right click and "save as").

Show notes:
- Recorded on a sweaty night in Beverly, Mass.
- Boston went from Loserville to Titletown
- The legend of Wayne Gretzky started when he was a kid
- Jay: Rooted for the Patriots when they were horrible
- Supporting our teams has been a mostly futile endeavor
- Jay: Reliving the Leafs' horrible choke against Boston
- Big sporting events somehow lead to idiots rioting
- NFL games are much more fun when you watch at home
- Jay: Still go to college hockey games
- Brian wept when his team won college lacrosse championship
- Jay: I want to see the Leafs win the Stanley Cup before I die
- Brian roots for New England Revolution
- Jay: Watching the Leafs in the playoffs is a tense, miserable experience
- Brian: Still hoping Sabres and Bills will win it all
- More "pink hat" fans in Boston
- Jay: I watch every Leafs game no matter how much they suck
- Find Brian's comedy dates and fun stuff at his website
- Bonehead of the Week


Music:
David Byrne and St. Vincent - Cissus
Overseas - Old Love
John Vanderslice - Raw Wood
Stephen Malkmus - The Hook

Completely Conspicuous is available through the iTunes podcast directory. Subscribe and write a review!

The David Byrne and St. Vincent song is on the EP Brass Tactics. Download the song from Stereogum.
The Overseas song is on the band's self-titled album on Undertow Music Collective. Download the song for free at Chromewaves.
The John Vanderslice song is on the album Dagger Beach on Secretly Canadian. Download the song for free at Chromewaves.
The Stephen Malkmus song is on his self-titled album on Matador Records. Download the song for free at Epitonic.

The opening and closing theme of Completely Conspicuous is "Theme to Big F'in Pants" by Jay Breitling. Find out more about Senor Breitling at his fine music blog Clicky Clicky. Voiceover work is courtesy of James Gralian.

Completely Conspicuous 281: The Outsiders

Part 1 of my conversation with guest Brian Lewandowski as we discuss our status as outsider sports fans in the Boston area. Listen to the episode below or download it directly (right click and "save as").



Show notes:
- Recorded on a sweaty night in Beverly, Mass.
- Brian changed his standup name to Brian Gerard
- Experimented with different names
- We both grew up elsewhere and moved to New England
- Rooting for non-Boston teams
- Brian grew up in Buffalo, is a big Sabres and Bills fan
- We're used to our teams losing
- Buffalo also had an NBA team in the '70s
- Brian moved to Kentucky as a kid
- Jay moved to southeastern Washington state
- Nobody there knew what hockey was at the time
- Jay: Right after we moved away, a junior hockey team moved to the area
- Jay: Never a fan of the Montreal Canadiens
- The magic of Don Cherry
- Cherry was played by Jared Keeso in a couple of Canadian miniseries
- Brian roots for the Atlanta Braves because he lived there for a while
- Jay: Rooted for Red Sox to win World Series in '04
- Brian's not a fan of the Blue Jays' stadium
- Jay: Grew up going to Blue Jays games when they were a new expansion team
- Jays' farm team is now in Buffalo
- Remembering the Hartford Whalers
- Sabres lost in Stanley Cup finals to Philadelphia in 1975
- Jay: One of my favorite players was Buffalo star Gilbert Perreault
- Big heartbreak for Sabres fans was in '99
- Brett Hull scored Cup-winning goal for Dallas with his skate in the goal crease
- Against the rules but officials didn't overturn it
- Atlanta's attendance problem
- The Bills had four straight Super Bowl losses
- Lamenting lost Super Bowl bets
- Jay: Still stinging from Leafs' game 7 loss to Bruins last month
- Leafs' loss to LA in 1993 also a painful memory
- Blue Jays had some horrible chokes in '85 and '87
- Jay: Joe Carter's World Series-winning homer in '93 was probably my last great sports moment
- To be continued
- Bonehead of the Week


Music:
Fidlar - Cheap Beer
Eddie Spaghetti - The Value of Nothing
TV on the Radio - Will Do
Archers of Loaf - What Did You Expect?

Completely Conspicuous is available through the iTunes podcast directory. Subscribe and write a review!

The Fidlar song is on the band's self-titled album on Mom & Pop Music. Download the song from Chromewaves.
The Eddie Spaghetti song is the track track of his new album The Value of Nothing on Bloodshot Records. Download the song for free at Soundcloud.
The TV on the Radio song is on the album Nine Types of Light on Interscope. Download the song for free at Epitonic.
The Archers of Loaf song is a bonus track on the reissue of Icky Mettle on Merge Records. Download the song for free at Epitonic.
 
The opening and closing theme of Completely Conspicuous is "Theme to Big F'in Pants" by Jay Breitling. Find out more about Senor Breitling at his fine music blog Clicky Clicky. Voiceover work is courtesy of James Gralian.

Hopeless Case of a Kid in Denial

Just a few weeks ago, I was reflecting on the glory days of the Toronto Blue Jays with not much hope for them returning to that level of excellence anytime soon. After a .500 season in 2011, hopes were somewhat high for at least some improvement in 2012, but a ridiculous swath of injuries cut through the team and left them four games under .500 and 22 games out of first place. The team was in a shambles and manager John Farrell bolted right after the season to take the helm in Boston, which he called his "dream job." Despite the seemingly capable mind of general manager Alex Anthopoulous, the Jays had a lot of holes to fill and fans were pretty down about the future.

And then this week happened. AA pulled off a monster of a 12-player deal with the Miami Marlins, getting three bonafide star players in shortstop Jose Reyes and starters Josh Johnson and Mark Buehrle and sending several young players and prospects in return. MLB commish Bud Selig is taking his sweet time signing off on the deal, mainly because there has been such an outcry about the Marlins pulling off yet another fire sale (something they did after winning the World Series in '97 and '03). The difference this time is the Marlins had spent the last offseason amping up expectations in the Miami area, unveiling a $634 million taxpayer-funded stadium, new uniforms and pricey free agent signings including Reyes and Buehrle. But the team stumbled out of the gate and owner Jeffrey Loria started selling off assets before the season ended. It's a mess down there.

But in Toronto, the city's going nuts. The Jays used to sell out the then-Skydome every night in the early '90s, but after the baseball strike of 1994, attendance and the team's performance dropped off considerably, as did ownership's interest in keeping up with big-spending teams like the Yankees and Red Sox. Hockey has always been number one in Toronto, but with the lockout inching inexorably toward another lost season, the Jays have a great opportunity to capitalize.

AA didn't wait for Selig to approve the deal before adding another key piece, signing free agent Melky Cabrera to a two-year deal. Cabrera is notorious for leading the National League in hitting before getting suspended for 50 games for using performance-enhancing drugs. Whether he's able to repeat last year's performance or drop back to his former self is to be seen, but Cabrera is an upgrade over the Jays' current left field situation and he makes the lineup that much more dangerous. And Anthopoulos got him fairly cheaply. The Jays still need to name a new manager, but reports are they're closing in on one.

What all of this means is right now, on paper anyway, the Jays have their strongest team since that early '90s squad that was a perennial contender. They've had superstars in the interim, like Roger Clemens (albeit steroid-aided), Carlos Delgado, Shawn Green, etc., but they've never had the full complement needed to really be considered a threat to make the postseason. Now it appears they could do that, if everyone performs to their potential and injuries don't take a toll. That's a lot of ifs, but I'll take them over the dispiriting reality of the last 18 years or so. Hope is never a bad thing, as long as you've got something to back it up with. We'll see if the Jays can actually do some damage next season, but I'm glad they're at least making the effort.

Mixology: Rock for Hannah

Mixology is a recurring feature in which I take a look at one of the many mix tapes or CDs I made over the years. Some are better than others, but all of them are fun to revisit.

Rock for Hannah (6/15/02)

It's been awhile since I did a Mixology post and until a minute ago, I honestly had no idea that it was 10 years to the day that I made this one. To give you a sense of how long it's been, this mix was made in anticipation of the 11-hour drive to Toronto that we were going to be doing to attend my cousin Dev's wedding. Hannah was just six weeks old at the time; now she's 10 (duh) and today wrapped up her last day of 4th grade. Pretty mind-blowing.

As for the songs themselves, I actually did choose songs that Deb and I could both agree on that also revolved around a loose theme of the joy Hannah had brought into our lives. And yet it's completely and utterly not mushy. There's some classics like "In My Life" and "Surrender" and even "Everlong," but I also threw in some Tin Machine and Sugar to add a little edge to the proceedings.

As I recall, the drive wasn't bad considering we had a tiny infant in the back. There was the requisite weeping and diaper filling and such, but Hannah was good traveler. Deb and I were new parents, so we were still figuring it out as we were going. But it was a great week up there and when we returned a year later for my cousin Anita's wedding, we had a surprise in tow: Deb was pregnant with our second daughter, Lily.

So my memories of this mix are all good, even though I can't actually play the CD anymore. It literally spent most of the last 10 years in our various cars and has been so scratched up that it's unlistenable. I'll have to redo it again someday.

Rock for Hannah

Surrender - Cheap Trick
Everlong - Foo Fighters
A Girl Like You - The Smithereens
Your Favorite Thing - Sugar
Will - Kevin Salem
Super Baby - Matthew Sweet
Baby Can Dance - Tin Machine
It's in Your Eyes - Sloan
It's Love - King's X
Smile - Pearl Jam
Tangerine - Led Zeppelin
Trip Through Your Wires - U2
Driver 8 - R.E.M.
It's Different for Girls - Joe Jackson
Surround - Dada
It's a Good Life if You Don't Weaken - The Tragically Hip
In My Life - The Beatles
Praise You - Fatboy Slim
Hey Hey You Say - Papas Fritas
Citysong - Luscious Jackson

I'm Watching You

This winter's been a dud from a snowfall standpoint. We're in the middle of a "storm" right now that's dropping a couple of inches of the white stuff on us, but we'll still be under 5 inches for the entire winter so far. Which is fine, but the girls are excited and are out playing in the backyard. They're old enough now (7 and 9) to play outside around our house unsupervised, although I'm constantly checking in on them and I told them not to go down the street. A year or two ago, I'd have been outside keeping a closer eye on them.

Of course, when I think back to myself at the same age, I was playing unsupervised nearly all the time. Like many of my friends, I was a latchkey kid. Both my parents worked, so after I walked home from school (which was probably a good mile, backwards in the snow), I used my own key to go into the house, fix myself something to eat and watch "Happy Days" reruns. Or I got together with my buddies to play street hockey or baseball or soccer. There were no cell phones in the mid- to late-'70s, so I didn't have to check in with anybody. I did have to be home by 6 for dinner, though.

The summer was particularly great because I was able to goof off all damn day. A few summers, I went to day camp, where we'd take a bus to a campground area and do camp-like activities all day before going home every night. Those were run by the town and last about six weeks. But during those times I wasn't in camp, I could get on my bike with my friends and ride all over town, usually to a park where we'd hang out and look at all the graffiti carved into the forts by teenagers. We didn't know what most of it meant, but we laughed anyway.

Halloween was another fun time because I would traverse the whole town with my friends and score tons of candy. Mom stayed home to give out candy, so I was on my own. We never had any problems, except one time when some teenagers stole the bags of chips we'd gotten. It was a minor loss.

It really was a different time. Pickering (the town in Ontario where I lived from age 7 to 14) had a small town feel to it back then, when the population was around 35,000; it since has grown to 100,000 as people have moved out of Toronto to the 'burbs. The only time I was ever scared was when we were sitting on the porch with my dog and she barked at some drunk staggering by; said drunk then sauntered up to us and told her to shut up before going on his way. The dog pissed all over our front steps and I was kinda freaked out.

I read the newspapers pretty closely even as a child and was well aware of freaky shit like the Son of Sam, but it never seemed to touch my world until one time in 1980 when I was visiting one of my best friends, Charlie, who was preparing to move out west to Calgary. He was staying in Cabbagetown, a rough area of Toronto, and I stayed over for a night or two. We were out goofing around in a playground at night and saw some folks come through looking for a little 6-year-old girl named Lizzie who had disappeared earlier that day. She had last been seen in that park, walking hand in hand with a man. We hadn't seen her and I didn't think anything more of it until I got home the next day and heard on the news that she had been found murdered. Pretty shocking stuff. Nearly 32 years later, the case is still unsolved. That was the first time I really thought about the dangers of the big city. Not that those kinds of thing can't or don't happen in the 'burbs, but it really hit home after that weekend in the city.

Now I can't imagine letting my girls go to the park or walk to a friend's house that's farther away than down our street. Call me paranoid, but it's a different world. I'd rather be a little overprotective if that's what it takes to keep my kids safe. Long gone are the days of unsupervised 7-year-olds.

You Never Know

The first day back to work after a vacation is always difficult, but today wasn't so bad. I wasn't too far behind. And in three weeks, I'll be on vacation again...

Toronto was fun. We didn't go nuts trying to do too many touristy things, partly because of the weather and partly because we didn't feel like it. It felt good to get a decent night's sleep on most of the nights there. We ended up not going to Pickering as I had planned on Friday because I stayed up so late Thursday night yapping with Dev, both for the podcast and then for another 75 minutes afterward. Didn't get to bed until 2:30. By the time I had dragged my butt out of bed and shook the cobwebs out of my skull, it was too late to make the hour trek there and back. It was also cool earlier Thursday evening to see my old buddy Stephen for the first time in 30 years and meet his wife and cute-as-a-button daughter. We both acknowledged that it was kind of risky to get our families together since we had no idea what the other was like, but I think we each got a good vibe off of FB that the other guy wasn't psycho. And the wives and kids got along famously, too. Hopefully, we'll see them again before too long.

Friday night, we went out to a surprise 40th anniversary dinner for my uncle and aunt. Chowed on some delicious Indian food and got to hang out with my cousins and their spouses for one last evening. We were up early Saturday and hit the road before 8. Luckily, all the forecasts calling for thunderstorms were off the mark, because we had beautiful weather the entire way home. We stopped at Niagara Falls for an hour or so to let the girls check it out and then got back on the road. There were no major traffic delays and we made it home by 6:30. The girls were great on both road trips, which is good because we've got an even longer drive in a few weeks when we head down to Hilton Head.

Speaking of the road trip, I put together a road-themed mix especially for the trip that got me in the right frame of mind:

Spoon - I Turn My Camera On (a favorite of the girls)

The Black Keys - Have Love Will Travel

Gary Numan - Cars

Sloan - D is for Driver

The Modern Lovers - Roadrunner

Judas Priest - Heading Out to the Highway

Deep Purple - Highway Star

Arctic Monkeys - Riot Van

Fu Manchu - Boogie Van

Mission of Burma - Careening with Conviction

Queens of the Stone Age - River in the Road

Foo Fighters - Long Road to Ruin

The Feelies - The High Road

Drive-By Truckers - Road Cases

Frank Black and the Catholics - Pan American Highway

Mr. Airplane Man - Lonesome Road

The Tragically Hip - Highway Girl

Joe Strummer - Highway One Zero Street

Spoon - Car Radio

Robert Pollard - Supernatural Car Lover

Arcade Fire - Keep the Car Running

Yeah, it was pretty literal, but it also rocked. Like the vacation.