Friday, November 22, 2013

The Mayor of Simpleton

It's no secret I've got a soft spot for the city of Toronto. I was born there, lived there until I was 14 and still all these years and miles later root for crappy Toronto sports teams. I've still got family and friends up there, and we just had a nice vacation up there this summer.

Which is why I've got such mixed emotions about the whole Rob Ford fiasco. If you've been living under a rock that's located underneath Aquaman's underwater lair, you're likely the only person who hasn't laughed your ass off/shaken your head at the ridiculous series of events Ford has triggered over the last year or so: Being caught on camera smoking crack, denying said video and said crack, admitting said video and said crack, being accused of sexual harassment, other drug charges, making a reference in a press conference to performing cunnilingus on his wife, bowling over a female city councilor during a meeting, getting caught on tape threatening to kill someone. And this is just the most recent stuff. It's gotten to the point where people actually refer to Ford's title as "Crack-Smoking Mayor Rob Ford." Boing Boing regularly calls Ford the Laughable Bumblefuck, which is about as accurate a description of the man as you'll find.

Naturally, Ford's become the laughingstock of the tabloids and late-night TV:

It's hard not to find this hilarious...because it is. Sure, it's sad that this buffoon is leading one of the biggest and best cities in North America, but really, are the best and brightest getting into leadership positions these days? Here in Boston, we've got Tom "Mumbles" Menino, who regularly butchers names and the English language and yet somehow has led the city of Boston for 20 years. And one can easily run off any number of presidents, politicians and other public leaders whose IQs are sub-standard. So the law of averages probably means that a dolt like Ford was due to get elected eventually.

I want the best for Toronto because I still consider it my hometown, even though I haven't lived there in more than 30 years. At the same time, I'm enjoying the hell out of this Rob Ford fiasco. I hope he gets re-elected because dammit, this shit is funny.

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