Friday, May 27, 2011

One to Grow On

Remember when all our important life lessons were doled out by TV shows? Nancy Reagan showed up on "Diff'rent Strokes" to remind Gary Coleman and crew to "Just Say No" to drugs (and by extrapolation, everything). It was the epitome of the Very Special Episode. The same show also warned kids about bullies, racism, and a Very Creepy Episode, Gordon Jump (Mr. Carlson from WKRP) played a child molester. Similar tropes played out on numerous other family-themed shows of the '70s, '80s and '90s, including "The Cosby Show," "Webster," "Blossom" and "Full House."

The mack daddy of the life lesson show was the ABC Afterschool Special, which ran from 1972 to 1996 and covered every social issue imaginable, from teen drinking to pregnancy to hitchhiking to child abuse.

But my favorite font of wisdom was the shows that dared showed the dark side of rock n' roll. "Quincy" was a great show, anyway, because it featured cranky Jack Klugman of "Odd Couple" fame as a coroner who solved crimes and any other social menaces that presented themselves. The Quincy Punk Episode is legendary for its warning to parents of this new threat to social order:



It inspired a great Spoon song many years later:



Punk also made an appearance on the Don Rickles sitcom "CPO Sharkey," featuring the Dickies:



The California motorcycle cop show "CHiPs" featured a memorable episode with punks, including the band "Pain" wreaking havoc:



But my all-time favorite was the CHiPs episode featuring an Alice Cooper/King Diamond (albeit several years before he burst on the metal scene) clone named Moloch, played by the immortal Donny Most (Ralph Malph from "Happy Days"):



See, folks, rock can have a dangerous effect on your kids unless you monitor them closely. Stick with the disco, kids:

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